How Good Enough Mother Was Born…

Good Enough Mother always wanted to write a book but I had no idea what that would be about. I was struggling to be a decent mom and listening to horror stories from my friends who were trying to provide perfect childhoods for their kids when it hit like a bolt from the blue, GOOD ENOUGH MOTHER!  Though not a new term (psychologist D. W. Winnicott used it years ago) it was very appropriate for the way I was feeling and the cornerstone of my philosophy, which is that you don’t have to be perfect to be a great parent. I sold the idea to Simon and Schuster and the book was published in 2007.

In late 2005 I was working as an anchor on The Early Show on CBS and after another management change, there were rumblings that they were going to make talent changes. (Whenever management says they want to change direction OR focus OR the look of the show, it’s always easiest to start with the anchors). Before I knew it, I had been voted off the island. Yep, fired!

But I had Good Enough Mother, something that was borne of my life and hatched in my brain and no one could take that from me. It has not always been easy going and I’ve had a couple of stops and starts along the way. But I’ve learned, grown and am going forward with the platform I created, instead of waiting for someone to gave me a platform (that could be taken away at any moment).

So I was very interested to read this blog post by Valeria Maltoni called 34 Reasons to Start a Blog.

There is so much that she talks about that is germane to my life and business I am convinced it was no accident it landed in my inbox.

I am not going to run down all 34 reasons; hell you’re smart and you have the link there so use it! But here are a few of the one that really spoke to me.

NUMBER 11: BUILD COMMUNITY. When I was working at CBS, every morning at 8:30 I would rush upstairs to the green room and call home. I needed to make sure everyone was up and ready for school, breakfast had been eaten and backpacks were packed and they were headed out the door. In other words, in addition to my professional duties, I was keeping things running smoothly on the home front as well. Inevitably things would slip through the cracks; a forgotten permission slip here, a homework assignment there and there were times I felt like a failure. I knew I could not possibly be the only working mother out there who was juggling (and dropping with alarming frequency) a ton of balls in the air. I wanted to create a place and philosophy where women could read about other women like themselves and drop the whole competitive parenting thing (oh please, ENOUGH).  The book paved the way for the website which is growing by leaps and bounds.

NUMBER 28: GAIN VISIBILITY: For most of my career I have had agents. Some from small firms, some from big name agencies that are household names. But after I left CBS, my longtime TV agent, a guy I had been with for as long as I had been married (15 years), stopped calling me. Not only did he stop calling, he didn’t pick up the phone when I called him! It was a pretty shitty way to end what I thought has been a great relationship. I was on my own for a while and then signed with another big firm. But I am here to tell you, every single thing that has happened for me and for Good Enough Mother over the last several years has happened because of the work I did myself!  I, not these agents, have a vested interest in making Good Enough Mother and Rene Syler a success. Since I am not on TV everyday I need a way for people to find me, a cyber-home if you will. That little piece of real estate is www.goodenoughmother.com.

But it was months before I really learned how to make that work for me and I spent countless hours waiting for the call from agents that never came.  Guess what, no more, never again! If someone needs to find me, all they need do is type in Rene Syler in Google and viola! All done without publicist, handler or fairy godmother (or agent).

NUMBER 34: CHANGE THE GAME ON WHAT A BLOG IS: Personally, I’m no longer interested in sitting behind a news desk in a suit and presenting the news to a passive audience; I crave interaction and I get it on this site. That sharing is important because those who know me know I don’t pretend to have all the answers (uh, HELLO, Good ENOUGH Mother?). I am truly interested in learning from you and having you learn from, or commiserate with, me. The community of women (and some men) that check in here are smart and funny, savvy and interesting. In short, they have a lot to offer. This is truly a collaborative effort and I appreciate the help and support more than you will ever know.

I would urge you to take a long look at that list.  What are you doing to plant your stake in the ground so that others can find you? What are you doing that makes you unique and different from everyone else and do people know about it?  Please don’t waste another minute waiting for something to happen, MAKE IT HAPPEN!

Now get going! Good Enough Mother has spoken!